Blog Entry- Dwelling 5/13/21

I am still not a fan of this newer version of WordPress, haha. Maybe I have to adjust. But come on, why can’t some things be the same?

Heading out to work it seemed like time was still yet choatic. I was trying to focus on doing what was needed. Doing what the Lord knows honors Him, not because anything I do of my own effort was great but because God is great! I should take every moment of my life and devote it and set it aside for Him and His glory.

I then knew I had to get to my devotions. I was only focusing on a memory verse from Psalms but instead I because I wanted to do that book for morning devos (hehe) I thought “God lead me to a verse.” It seemed as life in Him sought fit I saw Psalm 91 to read.

It spoke again and again of the dwelling of the “secret place” of the Most High.

Here’s a part I just noticed looking over it now:

“He who dwells… Shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty.” Part of 1st part then whole 2nd part of Psalms 91:1 NKJV

Is there a way here on earth we can see the Almighty as a place of refuge? A place to just rest and meditate on His promises…?

As I stepped outside I was waiting for the bus. It seemed like it wasn’t coming. Growing quickly impatient I started walking back and forth people honked at me like I was being a maniac I guess, haha!

After a while it seemed like the bus wasn’t ready to come yet. I thought I was in my sinful heart patient “enough.” So I prayed the bus would come soon. Then at the right “time.”

Oh man, did He answer that prayer. And in a way I could never expect!

The sky was peppered with clouds giving the sky a beautiful hue. Also the sun was not overbearing but beaming down its spring rays. If it kept up like this I was probably going to lightly burn if the sun kept doing its duty, haha….

I wasn’t used to the sun being this strong. Especially in the springtime because it was my favorite time of the year (fav season! Not too hot like the summer and not too cold like the winter).

But then I shifted my focus from myself to someone else. A person from my church with whom I know his struggles. The poor man seemed stuck in them; like if other people are growing he would ask them repeatedly for little “rays” of sunshine to help make his day! Didn’t he realize he had his own ray too…?

Just because he struggled in alcoholism doesn’t mean he was far way from the hopes and love of Jesus!

So I imagined singing him a song.

In His presence/ There is Comfort/ In His pre-sence/ There is peace/

I didn’t remember the rest of the song (haha!) but I at least hoped in prayer the Lord would touch His heart in the only way I knew how. By His Holy Spirit.

Then I realized that He does that with me too…

…and like a gentle shadow of a shelter dwelling there was a “shade” that covered the beaming sun…

then the bus came. Amen!

Father with a moved heart, I am amazed by Your love and mercy. I hope that so many will know that Your love to know through Christ doesn’t just “convert” people but it does amazing things that only people who have their eyes opened for God understand!

Oh Lord, Father in heaven, Your will be done to your people and also may they be impacted greatly by how amazing You are to the point that they will serve You out of gratitude and not out of grumbling, that they remember that God’s love is for everyone but can impact ones that they witness and minister to…. that God loves us so much that no one…. NO one… should perish.

By the loving blood of Christ who shed His blood for all sin, Amen.

Thank you for reading this. And I hope at the very least this moved you in a way only God can do…. 😀

Just Be Love- 4/27/21

Three people died in my life over a period of about two years; I had another mental breakdown. I have had too many to count by now… sigh

Sometimes I’ve thought I’d known it all. I think I’ve gotten it all together yet God proves me wrong.

So many times I’ve thought I’ve unlocked the mysteries of God but then hardships happen that are beyond hard-to-take…

But we aren’t supposed to have all the answers. God is mysterious. There are things so mysterious about Him people try to comprehend them and don’t succeed. A pastor well-known on tv and has many books believes whole-heartedly in God yet doesn’t believe in the trinity. Another …. wait, I should say, and a so-called “pastor” I personally call an “over-comforter” only focuses on the good stuff in Christian life to the point I’ve found his way about things excruciatingly simple. Yet these people are human, people that are focused to do all they can for the glory of God. Maybe they are good at guiding anyone who loves Him or wants to improve themselves.

But hear this: God has mysteries we aren’t supposed to comprehend! I believe that is because He doesn’t want us to depend on ourselves or any worldly logic or even many “intellectual” discussions going from assumptions (science calls “theories” which according to a worldly intellect that has the highest I. Q., means something based on fact) etc. Scientific analysis that is proven to be a true about whether or not there is evidence in it, is still “but we believe THIS instead cuz this we believe is factual.”

God has many mysteries. Some people dubbed crazy religious nuts are the ones that are claimed incorrect and wrong. They might even be claimed “biased” or “incorrect based on data.” It’s not “fair.” Either thoughts, God is still the truth! Whether you think the world was founded by God or a huge round of trillion to one, hugely unfathomable circumstances.

God wants us to live for Him, and that’s that! God wants us not to have all the answers because we’re supposed to not have “everything to know” about the world and it’s many grand mysteries.

There is even a song I love. It’s an old hymn. It goes “if every stalk on earth a quill,” and a paper stretched out across the sky. Then in the tune you can picture ocean filled with ink, and if He wanted, could write about the love of God for anyone, for any people groups, for people just hurting for people suffering for people just wanting a friend, for people who just happen to label themselves “straight” or “gay” for people who struggle constantly fighting their drug habits, for people weary and sick of life giving their bodies away for people just sad they can’t do anything in life, for people who just want an ear to listen, for someone who listens to the news and is scared to death about Black Lives Matter and Antifa (Antifa though is worse. The founding of BLM has flaws but at least at the core of the people who are frustrated by it there is a people who are hurting, people sick of the horrible atrocities that happened during slavery, people sick of the injustices that they face in the world, awful prejudices and hate, being insecure to go out because they don’t want to be treated differently. That is understandable. But Antifa is just whiny bull-poop, haha!). God wants to show love to everyone, regardless of skin, creed, religion, even any form of struggle- to “drain the ocean dry.”

The love of God is vast and amazing. We’ve got to love not hate. We need to be for each other not be alone, we need to just love each other!

Lift up another in prayer. Show mercy and not judgement or seeing condemnation. We should not assume and think to judge, to condemn, before knowing each other but keep finding just how wonderful God, His people, His word, His majesty, His excellence, His patience, all things that are God’s that from whence He is, was, will work through and guide us, and many we just show love to one another.

Be a good example and love not hate. Be good to one another, not drive a stake in the middle of things, not shake things up when things are going well or to stir the pot and play things a certain agenda. Just be love!

Just please let’s all avoid the dern politics too, hehe! I myself became convicted of that. I’m a little ashamed more than I am about talking of things that really matter. I am a little ashamed to be a republican. Fanatics in the party sometimes drive a wedge between ones and not know someone by shouting at them before they truly know the issues. I am however not ashamed to be a Christian.

Just be love. Be love to and for each other. That’s all that God wants from us. And be love now because the world is ticking.

Blog Entry-4/14/21

A lot has happened recently. I will hint of some of this here. I want to recount something brief here. But there is a little message at the end.

I guess what I want to do is tell just how much I kinda lost it recently. It’s a sad small world that what I will tell you happened around the time somebody just died (related to another person who I happened to talk about in my debut blog entry!).

Sometime after this tragic thing happened I just didn’t know what to do. I had been working constantly (and had to work non-stop where the week prior I got my vaccine shot which was set up for me the day before I was going to be off for two days) and I wasn’t sleeping too well and hadn’t been properly exercising either. The only time I moved around was at work and also if I spent any time with my buddy Paul.

Well I think because of being so busy living like this, maybe my old nature which is constantly worried, almost always afraid of things caused me to do this.

This might not be an interesting story. I just want to tell it because it’s something I feel like has kind of been passed on maybe generations with my family (at least with my dad, haha!). But we are seemingly worry warts.

My buddy (who might not want me to talk about his condition) has some health problems. So one day I was just hanging at home not doing much interesting I realized I hadn’t heard from him in what I thought was eleven hours! I freaked out. I couldn’t help it.

So I went to the convenience store in hopes he was hanging there cuz it was a place he enjoys being at and asked the man at the cashier section if he had come in.

He said no. Usually if I don’t hear from him he’s just there. A lot of people see him so much there as he is a very talkative guy and likes to chat with everyone. So now no one I knew saw him. I hoped he was at home. Then I had a comforting realization that I did remember hearing from him (in a way).

I saw that when I was about to text him last he must have just gone to bed. It said as I was messaging him (he never saw it) that he was last on it about 15 minutes ago.

Whew, what a relief!

Now a normal person would just go home and know logically things were okay and he would message me when he felt like it. Right?

Well not me at that moment! After I left I had a thought. I felt like I would be a jerk if I didn’t at least visit his house to see if he was alright. So after confusing myself walking one direction then the other I made it final. I would see him.

Then I walked the way there, walking around in public late at night towards his house. By the time I made it I hoped that there would be evidence he was alright. I got to the house, still a little upset that his lights were out. If his lights were on I’d find a reason to knock (I felt if they were off he’s probably trying to get sleep which he struggles with at that place because his neighbors are known to make a lot of noise. Not always but at the worst times!).

Then as if an air of comfort came to me again I remembered I saw that last time he was on. He must have been fine. I theorized he must have dozed off right around the time I thought of texting him and as I said before he has trouble sleeping.

So I left his place the door of his house without knocking and went straight home. I found out later he was completely fine.

So now… why did I say all that? I’ve got to tell ya that in the bible Philippians 4: 6-7 it tells us to “be anxious for nothing” to give our requests to God. It also tells us ways we can give our requests (prayers) and it seems to imply we must do so with dedication. Do so with a great purpose and be thankful for all He has done for us. To be anxious means one is not trusting what God already has had from the start… and that is complete control. Control of the world amidst the chaos. Control of you. Your life.

Why must we be so anxious? I don’t know. I’ve been struggling with that since the first time I was hospitalized. I was afraid of what I thought was real but even then I should have trusted Him. I hope that in this crazy road of life I can give up all my anxieties. And I think I can! Just as long as I’m not like Peter looking at the raging seas when Jesus told Him to keep His eyes on Him. Trust Him.

Goodnight.

I’m Back! – 4/14/21

Hello readers! I hope you are doing well. I am sorry for the long drop in writing anything here on this blog. As you know last year was possibly the worst year this country (and entire world!) could face possibly. Going through this pandemic, I have been kind of in the front lines. Being a worker that is very vulnerable to people that I see day to day is tough though it was encouraging to see people I wouldn’t normally see (and I have been so appreciative of the kind words being told to me that they say for risking so much just to help them!)

While other places closed my work stayed open. I probably would have liked to stay home more often than not but in a way staying active in normal stresses of a work life probably kept me in good shape physically.

Anyway I almost halted writing a new blog entry but realized I had to give you guys something.

Just to tell you: I’m still here! I’m alive. And I pray that all of you are doing good as well!

I hope to see you again soon. If not “here” hopefully I’ve left a legacy on this earth, haha, so maybe we’ll meet again. For real. Just not in the way you might expect.

This current world with all the sickness and death is very frightening. Hopefully you can find comfort in the midst of it all. And God willing I can do guidance by the Holy Spirit from the One who guides me. Maybe I will get more chances to speak of the love of Jesus (Are you new here? Check out the many articles and reviews on this blog. There is a LOT of stuff!).

In closing may God look over your life journey, Jesus help you experience the broken but true path in life, and the Holy Spirit keep changing you.

With love in Jesus…

Movie Review- Left Behind (2000)

A heavy HEAVY note: I might sound like a grumpy, silly Gus in this review but if you hopefully keep reading know there was a reason. I still have yet to see the remake (I’m STILL unsure about getting to it) and this review seems harsh about the “original” movie version at first but know that with its sequel I am completely different on what I think there. Plus not bragging but I have the 3-movie set so yes, I do NOT hate this movie series!

Genre: Drama/ Apocalyptic

Rated: PG-13 (might not be good for youngsters) Contains violence and one scene of sensuality

Rating: Fair (2 stars out of 5)

Synopsis: “Buck” Cameron Williams, a well-known news reporter, has caught the biggest story of his life. It turns out that a man in Israel has invented something that will draw all to desire it as it might spell the end of famine in the entire world. But as he makes the innocent interview an attack on the land begins and soon after there are happenings which lead to an unprecedented event. Later, a shocking event occurs where people all over the world disappear and leaving the others wondering just how such a dramatic “rapture” of millions happened. But there are some who have known as they had been warned over and over about the end of the world and shrugged off the people as religious nuts. Was salvation now too late? They the doubters have now become left behind, and God’s wrath would continue to occur to hurtling the earth towards days it had never experienced before (for the worst).

Review: What to say about this film? There is actually so much! This might just be my longest movie review on here because I want to tap into so much but overall I want to give you reader, an overview. I want to cover its production, the cast in the film, and finally its brutal critiques (and I guess I am unintentionally adding to that here today, I just want to talk about the good and bad about this film).

Firstly I want to talk about the good. Let me again say how much I do like this story (based on the New York Times bestselling book series starting with “Left Behind” and a total of about twelve main books, two prequels, and spinoffs most of the them penned by the now late author Tim Lahaye) which offers an intriguing glimpse, an idea of just how the end of the world could happen if it followed the books in the bible. This book series I think is really notable, it being the first book series about a rapture story to attract believers and non-believers alike. No day I think went by without going to a bookstore and seeing this and the following others being publicly displayed alongside other well-known titles and upcoming newer authors.

To see that it finally managed a film deal and was produced was notable too. The one thing that is common though, as groundbreaking as these books were, they were picked up by a low-budget film company in Canada called Cloud 9 Pictures. They licensed the rights from Namesake Entertainment, which licensed them from the book’s authors Tim Lahaye and Jerry B. Jenkins. The rights were given to the filmmakers for the first two of the books from the Left Behind series.

Yes Lahaye expected a huge big-budget blockbuster to debut in the theaters (he was very into movies and trying to create movie-like scenes seemingly in hopes people could recreate those on the silver screen). But with a budget of 4 million dollars, the film titled Left Behind: The Movie was produced and released doing only what its backers and producers could do financially. Though receiving negative reviews the film and the short series managed to stay fairly popular with direct-to-video audiences (though this film had a limited yet theatrical release after being available to home-watchers).

Before I digress further let me focus on the film’s visual production. Yes it seems quite dated now but visually it’s lit well and does a great job showing off its attractive cast. There are a few great moments within the film that are pulled off well. My favorite (slight spoilers) is how it frames the apparent creation of the series in general. (Again I digress, haha) Lahaye came up with the series when he witnessed a pilot flirt with a flight attendant. Knowing the man was married he thought, “Just what if the end of the world happened right then? How would he feel if that had happened after doing such an act…?”

The film introduces the “pilot” with the “flight attendant” surprisingly in a nearly naughty way. Their relationship is budding though the pilot hopes they could take the next step, a direction they both had been hoping for. As they talk of their lustful feelings for each other the two then lean in for a kiss. Then the disappearances happen. When the film cuts back to the duo, they still hadn’t met lips but are thrown off by the plane’s panic that they are no longer thinking in that moment of their hopeful affair.

Another plus of this film. They really worked hard to go to “Show” versus “Tell.” If you want to make a book into a film you must do visual over internal, like having a character’s thoughts  be said allowed if film et cetera. This film makes a few small but improving changes in that respect: Buck Williams a reporter has been changed from a magazine editor/writer to a tv reporter as well as the state of the company he works for; the major characters get swept through in a clever device. The wife and pilot, the daughter, and young child all given intros at once that somehow are done easily yet don’t feel rushed; also lastly the finale in the film is like film magic. A kind of frightening take, especially once the audience is let in on the deception to what’s going on.

Okay now I will get into the cons or the “bad” stuff about this movie.

First I realize I must talk about the main gist of why I rated this pretty low. What is important to me in a Christian movie? The message! I mean that the moment the story gives the gospel. This was possibly the most restrained film concerning a story so bent on giving a Christian message that in effect it seemed like it almost forgot to have one. I think possibly the reason for that was this film was pushing to be seen in theaters and they got self-conscious about it so they decided not to “preach” to the viewers. There are wisps or an air of the gospel in the film scattered here and there but it’s kind of disappointing to be honest. Though I realized this is possibly due to a wave of Christians who would bring their friends to a Christian film only to lead the viewer to Christ if they did feel the “pull” on their heart to believe and trust in Jesus. Sadly that kind of cinema is becoming less and less prevalent nowadays, especially because films like this just do not get exposure if at all anymore (Note: The much-advertised Left Behind 2014 movie was not available anywhere in my area. I had three locations to see the film all from a movie theater chain! I wanted to at least to check it out but it seemed AMC did not approve of the film so it didn’t exist in their eyes, I guess!).

Also the music and cast were interesting to say the least. Bryan Duncan, an 80’s music star recorded and made for the film its theme song (it can be heard during the family introduction). So when this film released it was nearly at the end of a new century yet strangely the song sounds like it’s still stuck in the 80’s. Why was it planned like this (though it is a catchy song I have to admit)?

Also the cast does each their own part well they all come from television making this film almost feel more like a tv-movie special. From Clarence Gilyard (Walker: Texas Ranger) to Kirk Cameron (from sitcom Growing Pains fame) as the main character “Buck” Williams, pretty much everyone in this film seemed to get their fame from the silver screen.

All in all I do not regret seeing this film. Yes I was disappointed about aspects of it but overall I feel like the film series gets just a little better after this. I also appreciate that this film did not risk getting gritty and extremely violent (though some moments are unscathed from the book like Alan’s car explosion death) like the book series was kind of known for. I feel if they had gone that route they would probably miss out on giving a message while not as importantly get the usual “wow this Christian film is hypocritical” shouts from non-believers, strict Christians and critics alike.

It gives a message while at times vaguely Christian (seriously I don’t think “Jesus” was mentioned even once in this film!) is still worth at least giving a try before seeing anything that might hamper one’s chance to indulge in a Christian type of story (ahem ahem, Nick Cage, cough! Sorry, something was caught in my throat!).

Leave what’s not needed behind- Poem below 12/22/19

I just made a personal, spiritual declaration today! What more good timing than to give this poem I was going to post when written but became afraid because I thought it was too personal.

And hopefully I will give a Christmas type of post here but just in case my own timing is bad, here is a verse I just heard in church: “But when the fullness of the time had come, God sent forth His Son, born of a woman, born under the law, to redeem those who were under the law, that we might receive the adoption as sons. ~Galatians 4:4-5″

Here’s the poem:

Title: Burning Bridges

Some paths one should not return
Some places could be dangerous
To go back over a place one thought they were to stay away
A treacherous test to play

I thought I had gotten past it
To burn that bridge was once enough
But to feel the pull to go over it, singed it now is
Still thought just one more go would be good

But I might not make it back this time
I must not take the risk
To plan to demolish, destroy, to build anew
I should say “Goodbye” like to a cruel comfortability

And I will. Time to go and do it
And finally be free from its easy straying walk…
to endless good possibilities

Written 11/23/19

11/17/19 Quick Quip- God speak.

Was experiencing just this very thing where I was expecting God to talk to me but not reading His Word or making an effort to actually listen to Him. At church the message was about God seeming to be “unfair” and the so-called silence that people claimed God was being to them. Without grumbling I am just humbly saying I can be so blind to His will sometimes… 

We think sometimes God is not hearing us. Depending on the situation God might want us to learn something we don’t see in that moment, that time. We can use that so-called lack of voice to grow, to depend more on God. But I plead we must never think God’s “silence” means He has abandoned us.

~ C. J. Scurria

11/17/19

Sing Today

I sing today grateful of love

that paid the price on Calvary

My hope is now. I drag the pains

Of living life for You but still

I have known that You have died for

The world, this all-encompassed place

As payment from You paid in full

When it was I deserving of death.

How deep how strong is Your love still

From places covered by presence

That is perfect till You sent the One

Who’d be the only sacrifice

This moving to show Your wondrous love

This ever unending beauty called grace

Is but a speck to the big picture

Of what You’ve revealed to us right here.

 

Have a wonderful Easter everyone!

Quick Quip- A Pit 3/11/19

A good chunk of this sprang from reading a book that my church has been getting into lately by a great writer. Maybe in a future post I will speak about this and the other book we covered that is about the Christian life but how we might get the wrong idea about how to live it.

Believe it or not but just moments ago I was feeling like I was in almost a pit of despair. For some time now, depression and complicated things in my life were feeling like they had power in tearing me down.

It wasn’t until I found a glimpse of a purpose; I saw someone I never thought of to pray for and feel like that began to open my eyes. I realized that the person had little to no self-worth and prayed they would find that in God. It didn’t strike me that something that was seeming self-seething banter was actually not that but a real reflection to how he saw himself.

It seemed that God has done this with me a few times maybe more. Where I had to feel lower than usual to realize that God wanted me to see HE was doing the work and not me! Too often I thought to live for God but telling others about Christ felt almost like a burden or something that would be too difficult. As my pastor has once said all as believers are called to tell and testify of Christ but there are some who think of this as a chore or with the wrong attitude.

For a while now I have also felt like I have a burden toward certain people and though I don’t exactly know the know-how to speak and reach these people in Jesus’ name effectively yet, I will still at least strive towards that as well as want to share the gospel with the people around me.

I hope that you reader will realize something greater than this life seems to offer. Sometimes life has to get us into a pit before we find out there is a way out and a path in life that is greater than we would ever expect. I hope in Jesus that He shows you the way as well.

Quick Quip-Restoration

Sometimes God will do things beyond what we expect. I even think of my testimony where God had transformed a part of my life that I thought only I could do (or at least try to succeed at it- I failed) and He did the impossible because of the change I had through Jesus Christ.

But actually God can if you know Him do things you can’t expect. He can restore Your life if you live for Him! But not everything is instant in happening in your life though; in fact sometimes you have to wait on Him for certain things (while that happens, build up your character in Christ) but it will be worth it.

I have not reached certain parts of my life I hope to achieve yet. I thought I was going to be married to someone, have kids, etc. but a lot of things in life got in the way (mainly my fault). In church just this past week, all I could think of was that I probably had a few things to give up: things I needed to bring to God and lay the burden on Christ (mainly using bad language even when I’m alone. I don’t like to admit that). But up until then I was seeing God doing many things in my life leading me up to Sunday and felt the tugging in my life. That was when I poured my heart out to Him in tears praying I will live for Him with all my heart. I want to give my all to Him.

I wasn’t going to just only give up little things while other things I knew were not good would just be like a hobby. I wasn’t going to half-“donkey” it. (You know what word I mean by that….). No but instead I feel that I should give back to the Lord, everything as much as I realized the day I was completely transformed by Christ.

Even believers need to be refreshed in the spirit and be restored to what God wants them to be at that point in their life. This is not saying that in one day you will be pretty much 100% like Christ (that is where sanctification comes in. Also it’s a process only we will never be perfect, not until we are gone from this earth).

I was reading a devotion by Max Lucado recently and one thing caught my eye. The title for that day was “A Complete Restoration” (just to note I wasn’t going in order like one would normally with devotional stuff like this). It says that God “has” to change us. If we aren’t changed by Him what can He do in your life? He must take down walls of hatred and replace them and other things with His goodness. We need to be transformed and restored or else what can we be when it comes to showing the light of Christ so that others can seek Him?